1Q 2019

4 months since my last post. And now y’all know why I stopped paying to host my own website.

Life, it is still crazy and some days I wish I was an attention seeking drama queen, but I am not one of those people.

I’ve started therapy, which is has been awesome. I’m finding me again. One of the suggestions was meditation and so I’m using knitting. No thinking, stockinette. Just knitting. Sure, I have harder projects, but I save the easy stuff for meditation.

I’ve finished two sweaters for me, one for my mom’s dog (despite the cat modeling it), and a shawl.

I’ve also had adventures in Nacogdoches, at the zoo, and hanging with friends new and old. I have two sweaters, two pairs of socks, and a shawl on the needles.

I raised money for the WalkMS (which was cancelled due to rain) and I’m still raising money for the BikeMS. (Yes, you can still donate at the link) And if y’all want to do some good and in the meantime make someone suffer, you can donate to this link. (I have met my minimum, this person has not.)

I’m doing well health wise and have been fitted for an AFO for the beginning of foot drop. I wore high heels, probably for the last time. I had my infusion in my favorite zebra room. I’m looking at surgery this summer and am debating a go fund me for the hospital copay. $2k is a chunk of change. I’ll drop my PayPal here in the meantime if anyone feels like helping.

There you go, my first quarter summed up in a blog post.

How has your year been going?

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Letting go.

I haven’t talked much about becoming Borg this past summer. This is my new pancreas. It works a whole bunch better than my old one. It was 6 years of doctors just saying I was fat and type 2 and just needed to eat better and exercise. All it took was one doctor, one who listened, who ordered one blood test that changed my life.

It may beep and fuss and alarm at me. I may have to watch my tubing and always be attached. But, I’ll take that over feeling like crap all the time – not just because of the out of control blood sugars, but because of the doctor’s guilt trips and the ones I self imposed. If I worked out more or ate less or cut out a whole food group, I could get better. I felt like a failure for years.

Not all doctors know everything. Question them. Question them again. If something doesn’t seem right, get a second opinion. Get a third. The first doctor may have been right, but if you’re not getting better, you have to advocate for yourself.

So, I’m learning to let go of years of guilt and working on changing my thinking that I was a failure.

And that my friends, is your PSA for the day.

Happy Saturday y’all!

New Year’s Sock

Not cast on today, but worked on to the best of my arm’s ability. Inspired Maureen and her stripe phase, I bought this yarn sometime last year. They’re a bit further along now, and I’m enjoying the soothing rhythm I’ve gotten into.

Not that there haven’t been some pretty awesome things that have happened, but they were overshadowed by the shit show that hit a few weeks ago.

No resolutions for me as usual, but maybe some intentions:

  • I choose that this year be the best it can be.
  • I choose to be happier from moment to moment.
  • I choose to forgive others, and myself.
  • I choose to live well.

Happy 2019 y’all!

Sunday Socks – Tiny Edition

They aren’t perfect, but they’ll do for my mom who sassed me about how long it took me to knit her last pair. Might I add that she has women’s size 11 feet. She may not be able to wear these, but she has another pair in time for Christmas.

Be careful how sassy you get with a knitter!

In a twist of perfect timing, this little zebra showed up on my doorstep the other day. Obviously, I’m going to have to protect it from Piper.

Happy Monday y’all. May it be filled with wonderful surprises.

St. Nicholas Day

I think I was good this year? I’m not sure. Do I owe him a lap dance? Is he telling me something?

I know my husband is only 10 years into this tradition and he has proven that he technically understands. Growing up we’d get candy, an orange, and some type of clothing. I assume the Slim Jims are replacements for the candy because diabetic. I’m guessing the $20 is for my jammies. And well, a whole bag of oranges? Score!

Happy St. Nicholas Day y’all!

p.s. St. Nick brought my husband pods for his new nespresso machine (because diet) and jammies. I’m so glad he didn’t bring that box of Cuties he had in his cart for a brief second because I would have been paying people to take them.

Thanksgiving Sock

That right there my friends, is a sock that is dead to me. Noro taiyo sock yarn that just pulled apart mid stitch. Tiny needles and tiny yarn are not my friend. I cast these on two days ago and I can only knit about 4 rows before the pain starts. I’ve been stopping after 6 and taking breaks.

I should have let the kitten keep the ball when she stole it. She obviously knew it was going to be trouble.

In better news, I cheated and got a Greenberg turkey this year. I did boxed stuffing yesterday and scooped it out into balls for baking today. All the crisp edges! I’m trying this mushroom recipe and doing some quick sautéed green beans. Such a lazy day!

As I’m making the plates, I’ll be throwing enchilada sauce, cream cheese, turkey, and chiles in the slow cooker for some enchilada soup later.

My husband is going to the farm for the weekend, so I’ll be tossing my stash and looking for a different project. While I contemplate burning that sock above.

For those of you that are new, that was code for I’ll look at patterns on Ravelry and take naps. Then I’ll run around for an hour straightening up my mess before he gets home.

Happy Thanksgiving y’all!